Scrapbook

Jun
22nd

Mon

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they go by.

— Douglas Adams

Mar
25th

Wed

How to tell if somebody is middle-class #578

They own a Brabantia bin

Feb
11th

Wed

Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

— P. J. O’Rourke

See when you make a move out of frustration or anger it always ends in catastrophe

— Bobby

Dec
8th

Mon

‘We only call ourselves the Red Squirrel Protection Partnership because if we called it the Grey Squirrel Annihilation League people might be a bit less sympathetic,’ Redesdale announces, chuckling. ‘But we do nothing with red squirrels apart from save them by killing grey squirrels!’

— They shoot squirrels, don’t they? The Guardian

Nov
30th

Sun

Rappers from South Central Los Angeles look good in really baggy jeans; office managers from Reading do not.

— A WOMAN’S GUIDE TO MEN’S JEANS

Oct
28th

Tue

Sweet honey comes from bees that sting

— Candide

Jun
16th

Mon

Liquorice is good for you in moderation

— Sinead O’Hara,
Royal Homeopathic Hospital London

Apr
12th

Sat

The marathon is easy. There are no lions

— Maasai warriors running the London Marathon. The Guardian

Mar
22nd

Sat

We will probably be judged not by the monuments we build but by those we have destroyed.

— “Farewell to Penn Station” New York Times editorial, October 30, 1963

Jun
26th

Tue

It's just rubbish, mate

Two binmen pick up rubbish with metal implements in a park in Hackney, east London...
Tim: I play this game, yeah? I think of the story behind everything I pick up.
Rory: It's just rubbish, mate.
Tim: You should give it a try. Makes the job more interesting.
Rory: What was this? A newspaper. What's it now? A wet newspaper. Fantastic.
Tim: You're not even trying. What about this?
Rory: Oh, I've not seen an empty packet of crisps before. Stunning.
Tim: But they might have been eaten by a child who will be prime minister some day.
Rory: Not exactly likely, though, is it?
Tim: This one over here has definitely got a story.
Rory: Mate, it's a bloody tissue.
Tim: Sure, but what do you think it was before
Rory: Someone had a nosebleed. I'm not touching it.
Tim: But if we were playing the game.
Rory: We're not playing the game.
Tim: I'll tell you what I see. I see a terrorist, yeah?
Rory: Just sitting in the park?
Tim: And having a break from terrorist things.
Rory: And using a tissue?
Tim: He wants to go straight. So he says to al-Qaida, 'Listen, boys.' He's saying this in ... that other language. 'I don't want to ruin society, after all.' So one of the other terrorists comes and hits him in the face. Blood everywhere, but he's got this tissue.
Rory: What are you? Jeffrey bloody Archer?
Tim: Don't point your utensil at me.
Rory: I don't need to be acting out the life history of a tissue, yeah?
Tim: A terrorist tissue. You see how it passes the time, though? You see that?
Rory: You know what else passes the time. Doing work.
Tim: Doing work. I won't be stifled. Everything has its story.
Craig Taylor in The Guardian, June 23 2007

Jun
24th

Sun

Disease, famine, natural disasters and many other problems can not be prevented. We can predict and protect, but we can never prevent.

War is entirely made by man and only man can stop it.

Anybody who doesn’t love Toxic by Britney Spears is lying

Jun
19th

Tue

#13 Arriving in the pub late and everyone cheers you. It doesn’t mean you’re popular, it just means your mates are pissed. However, the rest of the pub doesn’t know that.

— 25 Things that make you a man

Jun
5th

Tue

Think Big Bird being violated by a grizzly bear